I came across a blog from another girl who was going through Breast Cancer and she had done a “FAQ” post which I thought was perfect because it answered a lot of questions in a condensed way and was a great source of information for people who were following her journey! I have attempted my own version of FAQs below, here it goes!
1. What is my treatment schedule?
I have 8 rounds of chemotherapy every two weeks, so 16 weeks total (although now I’m 1 round down, so 7 to go!). The first 4 rounds are a combination of two drugs and the second 4 rounds are a third drug. Both groups of 4 rounds have different side effects. The first 4 are heavy on the nausea side and straight up debilitating hangover feels. The second round is more muscle and bone/joint aches and fatigue – fun! Each round will be administered every other Wednesday. My next round is May 2nd. And then you can figure out the rest from there.
If all goes well (i.e. I have no infections or issues like running away or hiding in a corner somewhere, that would push chemo rounds out) my last chemotherapy round should be on Wednesday July 25th (you can bet there will be a celebration somewhere around that date). I then have a magical window of 4 weeks where I have no treatments but then have to start Radiation after those 4 weeks are wrapped up.
I have to do radiation because I chose to do a lumpectomy. If I had chosen a mastectomy, there is a very good chance I would not have had to do radiation – but hey I got to keep my breast, so who’s complaining now. My radiation schedule will be 21 days and I have to go in every single day for the treatment (with the exception of weekends). Yuck – right?
I figured out that I will be done all of my treatments just in time for October, which ironically is Breast Cancer awareness month. It’s almost like I planned it. Almost. So hopefully I will see you all at Booby Ball celebrating my finale!
2. Is “Chemo Brain” a real thing?
Yes, it absolutely is, and I had it. It basically gives you a foggy brain where you feel like you are not present or really functioning. I felt pretty foggy starting on day 2 and the fog didn’t really subside until about Day 6. I noticed I was having a hard time thinking of certain words, so my sentences would trail on until I could come up with the word, or a version of it that I could substitute in (I’m sure I didn’t make much sense most times). Thank you for everyone’s patience while I challenged myself to come up with every day words.
I’m surprised I was even able to put a blog post together. I recall thinking it was kind of reckless at the time, at the risk of everyone having to read a jumble of unfinished sentences. I had to play a serious role of “editor” for the first time. The fogginess even toyed a bit with my vision, things seemed even fuzzy for a while, not in focus. At least I can now blame my ineptitude on Chemo Brain though. So if I forget things like unloading the dishwasher….. sorry Mark, Chemo Brain! Btw, the fact that I can successfully use words like “ineptitude” in a sentence is proof that the fog has now cleared.
3. Do I get bored?
Kind of, but not entirely, yet. I am however very bored of cancer though. Since surgery things have been rather go, go, go, so I haven’t had much time to twiddle my thumbs. I would have to say the first time I felt much of any boredom might have been this morning, but it was perfect because I got my computer out and started going through my 500+ of patiently waiting work emails. Always something to do! For the times that Chemo Brain has cleared and I’m feeling back to myself, I am thankful that I can dive into some work and get the juices flowing again.
Alba also keeps me busy. She has to meet her friends at the park upwards of 3 times a day (so demanding), so that gets me up and about and kills time while I watch 20-30 dogs do hilarious things for upwards of 45 minutes to an hour.
4. Am I Positive Polly all the time?
No, most definitely not. I have my moments. It was very hard to get out of bed on Day 4, 5 and 6. I frankly didn’t want to. The idea though of Alba peeing and pooing all over the apartment did get me up, reluctantly. Lots of “oh woe is me” and “this sucks” and trying to figure out what I’ll look like bald so I can just get over it already. Picturing myself with a bike helmet on over my bald head….. you know, unpleasant thoughts like that. Lots of moments where the tears are coming out with no real end in sight. And some rare episodes of frustration get in there sometimes, although that’s not a frequent visitor, thankfully.
I try not to spend too much time on the idea of “why me?” because frankly, it really makes no sense – end of story, moving on! It would be so easy for me to get really worked up over that, especially after everything I went through with Deanna…. It’s almost too heavy to even go there. I’ve made sure that door stays shut.
Sometimes I get a burst of motivation and I say to myself “I want to be the most bad ass breast cancer fighter there ever was”, but then I come to the realization that to be that, I have to execute on it, and then I get a sudden wave of exhaustion and the motivation spirals away. I’m working on it though. Maybe I’ll get the title, but until then, I’ll take some baby steps.
Remember though that if you see me out and about, I very likely will have a smile on my face, and I may even look great that day, but don’t forget that I might go home later and lie in my bed for hours, because a short walk took so much out of me. Or when you saw me out for dinner or an event with friends, and lots of fun happy photos were taken, I got home that night and maybe cried and again was so exhausted by the ordeal that I was bed ridden. I don’t want to shadow over what you might see in me as positivity 24/7, because I truly do feel like I have a positive perspective for the most part, but I just want to let everyone know that it’s not always butterflies and rainbows over here.
5. What does my diet look like?
So this is a sensitive one, because we all have 102,902,932 opinions on healthy eating. But basically I’ve tried to stick close to a Paleo diet. Paleo diet defined by google is “a diet based on the types of foods presumed to have been eaten by early humans, consisting chiefly of meat, fish, vegetables, and fruit, and excluding dairy or grain products and processed food.” So yeah that’s pretty much what I’ve been doing and also working towards 100% organic. If now isn’t a good time to eat extremely healthy, then I don’t know when is! Plus, it’s not like I’m partying every weekend and unloading my bank account at the bar or at events or concerts, so I might as well spend it on good food!
I also am VERY spoiled in that my sister’s husband’s family (someone reminded me the other day that it’s also known as Brother in Law) runs an amazing organic farm in Meaford, ON, called Good Family Farms, so I have been eating their incredible organic grass fed pork, beef and free range chickens. It’s a treat!
This isn’t diet related, and maybe shouldn’t be in this category at all for risk of confusion, BUT I get to go play with their 12 little puppies in a few weeks – YES 12 PUPPIES! Again, just for clarification – not food/diet related.
6. Can I ever drink Alcohol again?
This is a sore spot. Apparently alcohol is a known cause (well part-cause) of Breast Cancer. Buzz killerrrrrrrrrrr.
It’s not fully understood but basically it’s been know that the body breaks down alcohol into a substance called acetaldehyde which can cause changes in our DNA which can trigger a response in the body which leads to cancerous cells developing (huh?.... I know). Also, alcohol increases levels of female hormone oestrogen – high levels of oestrogen can cause a cancer cell to multiply out of control. Since I am hormone receptor positive (meaning my tumour grew off of hormones), the latter could have been part of it. BUT WHO KNOWS.
So in conclusion, I have been told that I can only have MAX 3-5 drinks per week, and that is being generous. It’s probably more like 1 or maybe even 0 if I’m really reading between the lines. So unfortunately (or fortunately?), you might not see me dancing on top of the bar again anytime soon. Or maybe I’ll invent a liquor that is stamped “Breast Cancer Free” and I’ll just drink that for the rest of my life. But in all seriousness, I could really be rid of hangovers for the rest of my life – especially after all these non-hangover hangovers I’m going to have to put up with.
That’s all for now – but happy to answer any questions that may come to mind as things go on!